THE "BAD
AMERICAN"!!!
YES, I'M A BAD
AMERICAN
by George Carlin
I Am Your Worst
Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.
I believe the money I
make belongs to me and my family, not some mid level
governmental functionary be it Democratic or
Republican!
I'm in touch with my
feelings and I like it that way, damn it!
I think owning a gun
doesn't make you a killer, it makes you a smart
American.
I think being a
minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not
entitle you to anything.
I believe that if you
are selling me a Big Mac, try to do it in English.
I think fireworks
should be legal on the 4th of July.
I think that being a
student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than
working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents
are footing the bill to put
your pansy ass through 4 years plus, of
college, you haven't begun to be
enlightened.
I believe everyone
has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they
want to.
My heroes are John
Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and whoever canceled Jerry
Springer.
I don't hate the
rich. I don't pity the poor.
I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.
I think global
warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when
I'm freezing my ass
off during these long winters and paying, paying,
paying?
I've never owned a
slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years In
the
desert after getting chased out of
been persecuted by the Turks and neither have
you! So, shut-the-Hell-up
already.
I want to know which
church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson
practices, where he gets his money, and why he is
always part of the problem
and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on
that one?
I think the cops have
every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running
from them.
I also think they
have the right to pull your ass over if you're breaking
the law, regardless of what color you are.
I think if you are
too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you
deciding who should be running the most powerful
nation in the world for the
next four years.
I dislike those
people standing in the intersections trying to sell me crap
or trying to guilt me into making
"donations" to their cause. These people
should be targets.
I believe that it
doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two
parents.
And what the hell is
going on with gas prices... again?
If this makes me a
BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American.
If you are a BAD
American too, please forward this to everyone you know.
We need our country
back!